Tuesday, November 30, 2004

Who's the cool criminal now?

The other side of the coin from my earlier post on the 'coolness' of crime: who's the cool criminal these days? Part of my central beliefs about crime (and it's not original, so don't sue me) is that crime is the central mythos of our culture. From Jesse James to Al Capone to Michael Corleone to Tony Montana to John Gotti to Monster Kody, we've always had our favorites of the moment.

Is it still gangbangers? I guess so, although its missing the cultural weight that it had in the early 90s, when Menace II Society and N.W.A made everyone stand up and take notice. It could come back, though. Especially after buying Grand Theft Auto 3 (finally). What a game! It allows you to totally submerge yourself into your 'banger charecter, going so far as to allow you to customize your car and looks. My guy, thanks for asking, is a bald, bearded shirtless buff guy with sunglasses and tats. (I modeled him after the aorementioned Monster Kody). I also got him a convertable low rider in his gang color (green), with shiny rims and hydraulics. And I love it.

Speaking of gang tats, here's a place to search for your gang ink.

The Man in the Onion

I can't link you to it, so you'll have to check out the Onion A.V. Club interview with James Elroy yourself.

Sexy, sexy Mormons

Theft. Underage sex. Multiple sex partners. These Mormons are just like the movie Kids!


I do realize that I glorify crime quite a bit. And when you read a story like this one, you know that there's nothing glorious there.

I beleive that it was Godard who said that it was impossible to make an anti-war movie, since war was simply too exciting to film. I guess I agree with that, and feel that if that's true, we might as well not feel guilty about it.

Monday, November 29, 2004

I wouldn't tell her either

The woman in Long Island that was nearly killed by a frozen turkey hasn't been told by her reletives that she was nearly snuffed by teens tossing a frozen fowl. Wait until she can laugh again.

The Medical Center

Still catching up from a week away from the Internet. Check out this piece on Red Roundtree, the recently deceased "oldest bank robber." You'll notice that Red died at the Federal Medical Center in Springfield, MO.
Springfield is my home town, and I know plenty of stories from that famous medical prison. Famous guests include Larry Flynt, Chuck Berry, John Gotti and Leonard Pelitier. In fact, I heard from a medical worker, who heard John Gotti's last words before they cut out his cancerous tongue. Would you like to know what they were? I bet you would ...

Sunday, November 28, 2004

Not dead yet

Sorry for the lapse. I've been on vacation for a while. I'm now at 27,000 words for my novel. I've decided not to push it to get to 50,000 words by the end of the month, so I dropped the ball there. But, it's still a good start. I'll get back to crime blogging tomorrow.

PS - re-reading The Grifters right now. Such as classic.

Friday, November 19, 2004

Play ball!

Thanks to Joe, who sent me this great link. Just click on it.

Thursday, November 18, 2004

Pickpocket Update VIII

Word Count: 19,213

Least effective crime fighting ever

Hey, I'm sure the crime in Jamaica sucks. But can marching do anything to stop it? It reminds me of an old Onion headline: "Increase the Peace movement lesat sucessful movement ever."

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Al Capone, Canadian-style

Check out this article on a small Canadian town (named Moose Jaw, for God's sake) that's turning to crime tourism to prop up the economy.

Pickpocket Update VII

Word Count: 15,951!

Monday, November 15, 2004

A blog to read.

Check out In the Hat for everything you need to know about LA's gang scene. The latest post talks about gangs spreading to, of all places, Idaho.

Another Gotti on Trial

Man, those guys should settle down for a little while.

Friday, November 12, 2004

Knotty Head Clique

Working for the New Times Chain makes it easy to find great crime writing. Here's more on a bank-robbing gang from Florida.

Colorado Call Girls

The Westword's David Holthouse, who've I've linked to before, gets in-depth with the madam of one of Denver's biggest escort services.

Thursday, November 11, 2004

Pickpocket Update VI

Word count: 12,204!

Trained killers

This isn't strictly a crime story. But it's must-read: How one sniper in Iraq can pin down a platoon of Marines for a whole day. Great writing.

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

Let's not be hasty here

This guy just got sentenced to life in prison after killing the elderly lady who lived next door, along with her two grown children, because he thought they made too much noise.

But it doesn't answer the question: how noisy were they? Some neighbors, it's only manslaughter if you kill 'em.

What, me worry?

Gallup says that people in the U.S. are less worried about crime than they were a year ago. Of course they are, John Ashcroft got rid of it. Thanks, John!

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

Pickpocket Update V

Okay, I'll quit doing these every day. But, hey, 9,414!

Well, guess we can disband the police department.

From Ashcroft's resignation letter:

"The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved."

You learn something every day

Today: British Crime Slang!

I was reading this article on DVD pirates, which tries to explain that the pirates aren't "harmless Del Ray boys." Del Ray boys? A little research brought me to this site, where I learned that Del Ray is one of the most popular figures on British TV. Huh.

Use it three times and it's yours forever.

By the way, my friend Joe probably thinks that DVD pirates aren't criminals.

More on the Israeli drug king

700,000 hits of E. That's quite a bit.

Monday, November 08, 2004

The Pickpocket Update IV

I'm doing these more for me than for you. But still: Word count, 6751. Now we're cooking with gas.

Oy Vey, Ecsta-sy

Another huge Israeli Ecstasy bust, this time in Miami. At one time, I found a good link to a page that outlined why Israel is at the center of the E world. Can't find it now.

I think it's called irony

So, the governments of the world crack down on "illegal" drugs, creating a huge worldwide criminal society. Who then realize that it's easier to make fake "legal" drugs than to muck about with heroin, so now 100,000 people in China can die. Let's hear it for the drug war!

Sunday, November 07, 2004

Pickpocket Update III

Sunday night, and I'm up to 4345 words. That's both a lot and not nearly enough. But how about some love?

Friday, November 05, 2004

The Pickpocket Update II

New word count: 1988!

Crime Sprees in the news.

Sorry, but I can't resist stories that actually use the phrase Crime Spree. Here's another.

The Ali G Movie

The British Ali G movie is just as stupid and funny as you'd think. If you don't know him, he's a Brit hip-hopper who happens to be incredibly dumb. I enjoyed his final judgement on the film's villian:
"He's a criminal! And not the good kind that sells drugs and does drive-bys!"

The Pickpocket Update

Word Count: 1,296 and rising! I got a late start due to election fever and post-election depression. Hopefully, I'll catch up this weekend.

Thursday, November 04, 2004

Murder in my backyard

Well, not really. I've never had a murder in my backyard; my brother has. This body was found on a pathway between two houses in the East Campus neighborhood of Columbia, Missouri. My bro lived in one of the houses: he parked his car about twenty feet from the corpse without seeing it.

But this murder happened at a gas station I frequent. In fact, it's where I pick up my Evening Whirl. The story was written by my friend Malcom, with awesome art by Tim Lane.

Honour Crime

Here in America, we go back and forth on the merits of harsher penalties for "hate crimes." But in Pakistan, the real issue is "honour crimes," or killing over matters of respect and tribal attacks. I'm not sure how I feel about that. And, considering I know jack shit about Pakistani culture, that's probably the right attitude to have.

"Scrape Dried Brains Off the Carpet"

The story is far too short. But the lives of crime scene cleaners gets short shrift, for certain.

Not irie!

Posted by Hello
You think crime is bad here. Check out what the cops roll like in Jamaica. From this article.

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

I don't do celebrities

I try very hard to avoid following the kind of trials that make it on to the cover of People. I'm not glad that Laci Peterson is dead. But I strongly dislike people giving so much attention to a single crime just because the victim was a pretty white girl.

But I'd run this article either way: When your lawyer talks about what a douche you are in the closing statements, you must be a huge douche.

Monday, November 01, 2004

National Novel Writing Month

Whoever decided to have National Write a Novel Month start the day before the election is an asshole. Grand total for today: 0!

Well, I'll have some catching up to do.

She looks so nice.

Check out this story on an Indian crime-mistress who just got popped. She don't look like a master thief.

Crime Pays

The FBI is investigating claims that a NY Met gave free tickets to Mafia bosses. Man, some guys have all the luck.

Yobs and Neds

Finally, someone is taking on all those damn yobs. Yob-sprees are a bitch.

UPDATE: Apparently, all those neds are inspiring a new crop of Scottish crime authors.